Don’t whistle.

Don’t wear peacock feathers, yellow or green.

Don’t wear blue, unless with silver lining.

The good guy should enter from right, the bad guy should enter from left.

When inside, including during The Half (1), don’t say her name.

During the opening, give a bouquet of flowers stolen from the graveyard. (2), (12)

Notice she has lit candles.

Mind that if one of you stands by the third candle from the left, you may get married, or die.

When first asked about how you are, say you are fine.

When asked about The Bald Soprano (3), look sad and bothered. (6) (7)

Say her name, turn around, spit in her face.

Ask for forgiveness, not permission

Break her leg, so she can’t leave this time.

But remember, that

Ghosts haunt her, and should be given at least one night a week alone.

Paint your room green. This is where you hide the person inside the armor and send it back out with a different man inside. (6)

When the sign says interval, get up.
When the sign says karma, get back in. (3)

Don’t mistake a clean play for a stable one. Remember that the most stable play in the world is an absurd theatre. (2),(4), (7)

Play The Cube; once when your relationship starts, once approaching it’s end. Evaluate the difference. Pay particular attention to the color of her horse in  relation to the flower and the position of the ladder.
Ignore the weather.

Leave your object of devotion at least once.

Wait for four eights, follow

Repeat two to three times depending on how well you are received. (9)

Watch soap bubbles fall down while Merry Widow is playing.

When finished, place a ghost light in the space she used to occupy, (10)

You may

leave it on,

and hope for a

fire. (13)

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